Feelin the Burn

I am very content again today (yesterday) because I was finally able to see Carol. She is going through a hard time, but I feel like she is doing very well. She has grown a lot and is doing a lot better than she would have when I first met her. It was good hanging out with her and I had fun seeing someone besides my family...

What we did for most of her time over was knit and watch Sweeney Todd. We also broke out my wedding tiara (bought it on clearance YEARS ago) and I have officially re-fallen in love with it. I see others and sometimes forget why I picked it out in the first place. It is very unique and I think represents me well... Also on the topic of hair. Carol was brilliant and figured out the clipping mechanism in my extensions....long story short...I feel dumb!

Also, today I finally went on a long needed run/walk. Carol came and we went about a mile. I know it isn't much but it is more than I have done in a long time. I am actually impressed with how well I did. We did some warm ups ahead of time and I think it helped a lot. I am now feeling better about doing these exercises. I also followed up tonight and did some push ups and crunches. These will be a new nightly routine until I finally lose the weight I want.

Which leads to my last decision. No more trying to hide the fact that I am trying to lose weight so I wont be embarrassed if I don't succeed. I want to lose weight. I want to look better and feel better. I want clothes to fit and I don't want the occasional self consciousness that I get. Finally I don't want to weigh so much more than my boyfriend. I know he doesn't care and it should not matter, but it is one of the occasional self conscious things....plus I finally have a reason to actually fulfill my goal...I am pretty sure I will run with him this semester as well.......

Gaaaa Anti-fatness

Winter Break.....

I am very content with today because I have called all of the people that I have been meaning to call all break.

I first talked to Ashly and we played catch up for a good hour. It was nice talking to her and I have found out that she will be coming up in the fall for a visit to RI! A Christmas present from her parents that is also good for me. I just hope I will be in RI during the same time....
After gossiping with Ashly, I finally called up Joe. I accidentally woke him up from a nap (I really need to stop catching him at bad times), but he said he didn't mind and we talked for a good amount of time till his sister called. I woke up my computer at the same time so I never got a call back because we were chatting.

I forget how easy talking is and really wish I didn't fret so much, but at the same time I feel very conceded because in both conversations I talked mostly about myself...I am having one of those days when I feel like I am a selfish person. I dominate conversations too much and I feel like I need to think of others more than I do, but at the same time I want people to share with me (but I am not going to push for information if they don't feel like sharing!) Maybe today was just my day for talking.....

In other news my room is almost clean! I only have a few small details to work out and then I will be all set. I am mainly doing this so I can have people over my house. At the moment this will only consist of Carol and Joe...I am so close to being done though, and I am very proud of myself for taking the Fly Lady method of just throwing crap out. I really do keep WAY too much that I just don't use. I chose not to care and I feel slightly better because of it.

Also I have been knitting like crazy for the past couple of days. I am almost done with the scarf I have been working on and may move on to a matching hat next (and if I am REALLY ambitious mittens). After those projects I am going to make a striped scarf out of fun fur...I think with all of my crazy colors it will turn out to be really funky and maybe I can sell it for some extra cash.

I really need to start making things for income. When I get my jewelry projects back from school they are going directly on etsy! This should be good because I will make back the money I spent on the silver I had to buy...

That is about all....may hang out with Carol if I get a hold of her and Joe and I may hang out at Harvard Square eventually.....I really need to get over my hate of going places. I don't want to be boring but that is the mood I have been in for like a month....

To call, or not to call...

After a long night of Photoshoping, I have finally decided to take a break and update. My day was not eventful, with the exception of going to my aunt and uncle's house for "Christmas" and I couldn't help but noticing I really wanted Joe to call me because we haven't talked in a little while (not really but I am used to talking to him everyday so you have to understand!).

I am trying so hard to not be annoying, I do not know whether or not I should even call my boyfriend when the mood strikes me. Though, there are also some legitimate reasons to why I have yet to do it yet over break (with the exception of calling back)

1. I don't know what to say...I feel like I am going to just babble about nothing and then we will be sitting in a silence that is only awekward for me on the phone because of the fact I know I am the worst person to talk to because I feel like filling the void of speach....
2. I really don't want to bother him when I have nothing more to say than I miss him...I'm a creeper
   
3. Still don't want to be annoying....

I feel that we can handle talking on the phone but it is still hard for me to do. I wish that he had a webcam because video chatting has always been so much easier and you can almost pretend the person is there. With the phone all you have is the tone of voice, but in the video chatting you can also perk in body language and it makes the talking more natural...

And that is my main confliction...gaaa to me

I suck.....

I know I promised that I wouldn't, but I totally suck at blogging regularly. I kept putting off my latest entry, because I had run out of time....but now I sit here with plenty so I am starting up again, but I am not going to be anal or put pressure on myself to keep this up. I feel like that pressure is part of the reason that I did not blog so much. I also feel as though this is not as brilliant as it could be because it is so public, but my private entries will stay that way...

The reason I had originally stopped my casual streak is because I was waiting for my boyfriend Joe and me to start dating. I had written an entry not long after (Nov 14th) but it was way to soon to write a post for it because I was still digesting this fact myself. It was a hard concept for me to grasp because, for the first time, things were going perfect in my life. I see that I did in fact have a small depression that it seems my entire family was going through and I found what I had been searching for in my life (which showed up in my art)

A long time ago, a small while after RISD pre-college, I had noticed that something was missing in my life. I was content, but my art was lacking something (and I was told that on national portfolio day). I was afraid and embarrassed to do certain drawings that would really express too much of my self and, as I know now, I was unhappy along with my lack of motivation. I feel like this is why I have never really acomplished much of my goals that had not come easy to me. I would always get tired and say "Screw it" while I was at my prime.

There is something about Joe's personality that really made me not think so much about what I was doing. I heard words of inspiration that he said to me while I struggled. For some reason I had strong feelings from the very begining and I feel very drawn to him. I pushed my comfort level to get closer to him, and it definably payed off. I have not only gained a wonderful boyfriend, but I have grown as a person as well.

It took me a long time to process what was going on (I think) because I was afraid that when I accepted it, I would find out that it wasn't real. I wasn't afraid to be myself, but I was afriad to pda to all levels because of my past. On a logical level, I understood that this was stupid, but that wasn't the dominant feeling...My only wish is that it didn't take me a month to get over that...

At the same time I do not wish that anything went differently. Because we were friends first, I was able to know him better than if something had been done a week or two in. I am glad for this, even in my doubts I flirted my butt off...and recieved it without retreating. (I would secretly fear that guys would only pretend to be nice...long story...)

Any way, 80% of my social fears are over. Unlike when I got back from Thanksgiving break, Joe will be getting some PDA the second I see him.....as long as my balls still permit.....


Also, I may be able to post more now....but I am not forcing it.....

Giving Thanks

If you recall, the last post I had made was regarding something that I could not write about until it had happened. The greatest news is that it finally happened!

This is one of the things that I am giving thanks to. I am currently dating a guy named Joe and suddenly things in my life are very different then they were a couple of months ago. Even before we had dated he had a way of making my day better, I looked forward to seeing him and he always found a way to make me feel better. In this relationship, I found the thing that I had been missing in art for so long.

It was not exactly what I was missing in art but what I was missing in my life. I realize now that I was in a small state of depression (one that my entire family seems to be in) and I actually did care that I didn't have a boyfriend. I feel very content with life and for some reason I am also losing weight....for no other reason than, I am happy...

I am really seeing the purpose in just about everything that has happened to me. All last semester I had such trouble with housing and becoming an RA...I fought so hard to live anywhere but here, but it turns out that here was where I was suppose to be. No matter what happens I am glad that I came here, this is what was suppose to happen and I feel like I have already grown from it.

*A/N written on 11/25/08 but not published till 6/24/09*

Long time, No post

I know I have not posted in a while....but I have good reason. This story will not even be ready until I finally have all the pieces together. I know this is redundant and would drive even me insane, but it is not internet safe yet....I say this for my sake not yours....................
Besides that school is going well, but also is sucky sucky....I really need to focus harder and get my grades higher....not that they are bad, I just want As.....and .......until the news comes.....

Patience

,I Swore to Myself I was going to be better about this...
Blogging just Seemed to be easier when I finaly would have something to write about, but all I have written so far is how my first couple of days went and how I just bought Photoshop CS3.....To be exact, I have installed the entire design standard the only things that I have really been doing since then is making some creations and posting them on my Deviantart...most of these are class projects!
Any way, something that I have recently been working on is regaining the patience I have once had with art. Somewhere between RISD (precollege), UMass and the Career Center, I have lost some of my interst in taking my time to do things perfectly. I think this started at RISD and I have only recently been regaining my love for what I am doing, finally adding the passion it lacks.
In the back of my mind I hear Moddocks' words over and over again. "These are really great drawings but they are missing the passion, it seems like...." I am really pareaphrasing this, I lost most of the words long ago, and I am still only guessing (by speach patterns) that it was Maddocks who critiqued my artwork on National Portfolio Day in Boston...any way he said those images looked like I didn't even care about art....and to be honest, after RISD precollege I was just exosted and no longer cared....I didn't agree with any of their propositions on art and felt as though everything that I thought was skillful had been a lie!
It is really the whole concept of abstraction that baffled me, how a random line on a paper could be art was pretty much out of my coheirence, and some how all the people who didn't try and through crap (almost literally) together managed to make it best. Everything they were graded upon was the "concept" and their ideas on what they were making a statement on was the only thing that gave them their grades. Though this was not the same for everyone, I still resent RISD for that, you had to be a good BSer in order to make it there and I was NOT about to do that.....
National Portfolio Day was another reason I have chosen to reject RISD. The woman who was reviewing me was just rude. My major was suppose to be Graphic Design and she basically through my best designs from class aside saying it didn't mean anything to them. The breaking straw was her whining at me about how I had a "horrible self portrait" when she wasn't even looking at a picture I drew of me....I had a portrait of Carol in there and to be honest she doesn't look anything like me!
When I told the woman that it was my self portrait she looked at me as if I was lying and then, with an attitude, went through an found my self portrait and said nothing more than "well that's better" I was like DUHHHH....portraits have been the most frequent thing I have drawn since eigth grade when one of my teachers told my class "Every true artist has mastered the human form..." ever since then I have been determined...
Long story short...It took me a long time to get over these negitive feelings I had towards art and my drawings suffered. I think the best thing that had happened was me going into my figure drawing class last year....Elen was a strange teacher but she forced that block out of me. It took a while but I started noticeing the tention going away. It isn't that I damanded perfection from myself that was the problem, but that I was so afraid to draw something imperfect I avoided drawing things that I wasn't about to erase.
During winter break, I rehabed myself. Drawing crazy things that didn't look tidy and neat, breaking myself out of the bad habits. I ended up having Ellen again for structure drawing and midsemester she got mad at me because I had lost the way I use to draw, the part that she had liked the most. I have a cross hatching thing I do when I shade where there are so many lines, the merge together making a value....this was something good I lost....I spent the rest of the semester training myself to do both....mixing the old and new to create some good drawings...for once....I had one issue by the end...my drawings never look finished. I was still terrified just enough where I would not erase and block things in....but luckily it all ended with the portrait of Abigail I had drawn a long wile ago...
Anyway, I still find myself facing these struggles in my art classes. The only things I don't struggle in are Graphic Design and Digital Media....I know these classes and (since the last day of the Career Center during my senior year) I have true confidence in my ability. I am a Graphic Designer....or truely a Designer. Even with all of my issues on creativity I have (still the random fear of failing) I know, without a doubt, I can create a top design.

I may change my profile picture to the one I drew on my new favorate medium....Photoshop!

Photoshop

Yes, it's true. My life on campus is about to get much MUCH easier. For my classes...I will no longer be subject to the hours that the Digital Media lab has given me. My parents have given me the O.K. to buy the CS3 Design Standard off of my school store on Monday. I was so afraid I would not be able to do my work and now I know I will be able to do it, though it will be strange to have full design access at the tip of my fingers! I can't wait till I install the software, after I finish my Digital Media work on Photoshop.....I am TOTALLY playing around with stuff...most likely many tutorials....my teachers say tutorials don't work but i disagree....the tutorials show you how you can use things, but I think it is just a mind set they don't expect us to have.....any way......I am going to go ....

>_< Tired >_<

Right now I am exhausted and tired beyond belief. I have had a long week and no idea how I am going to finish my homework. The worst part of this is, I have plenty of time to do my work.
My schedule is not the most compatible with the Media labs. In theory I could go down before and after classes for very short amounts of time to work on stuff, but after a 12 to 9 day that just doesn't sound like fun for me. The good thing that may come out of this.....I may end up getting CS3 earlier than I had originally planned!
Other then the work that I can only finish when I don't have my materials, classes are going well. I really enjoy my schedule (until about 830 at night) and hope that CS3 will help me with planning and completing all of my assignments. I know I can do this year....as long as I have the supplies.
Any way, I planned on having a longer entry but I cannot keep my eyes open!

Back at UMass

It has occurred to me, I have yet to post on my first day back at UMass. Things were very hectic yesterday with moving in, meeting my new roommate, and the unpacking (something that has still not been finished!!!) I was so tired I ended up going to bed around 10, waking up only when my roommate came in and out...finally waking up around 8:30 when her mom came in the room.
I will be honest, waking up that many times does annoy me slightly, but at the same time I have already told her it was fine, and to be honest it doesn't bother me that much. She is trying to be good and not wake me and that is all that matters. Surprisingly, I am getting along with her more than most of my past roommates (even though there are very few). She is fine with talking and we end up talking all the time. I swear, we are the loudest ones in quiet housing...lol!
I am kind of glad things worked out the way they are, though I do not like the fact that I live right across from the boy's bathroom, while the girl's bathroom is at the other end of the hall. I think this calls for list making!!!
Pine Dale Pros:

• Two beautiful words....AIR CONDITIONING
  
• Close to campus (compared to the Dell)
• Elevators (go up on the elevator, down on the stairs...though might take the stairs every once in a while)
• Nice common areas (compared to Oak Glen)
• I am not living with them (now say that with flem!)
• One of my friends is in the hall
  

Pine Dale Cons:

• quiet housing scares me because some times I am loud.
• It isn't the apartments.
• I am afraid I am going to eat all of my week's food in a day so I don't need to go to Res...it is kinda far away....

• I am not sure where all my friends are...though one lives down the halll...that is a pro...
  

I actually like Pine Dale a lot and look forward to this school year....

Other exciting news:
I gots my Jewelry job!!!..

The love of Classical

Over time I some times forget how much I enjoy something and today that thing is my love for Classical music.
On occasion I am looking for Some soft music to fill the empty sound around Me. 80% of I yr. cal music does not scratch my itch on those days. ln giving up I realized what I was looking for was the purest music, the music that isn't Covered by powerful verse.
The odd thing is when I want classical I usually am looking for boroque, yet I do not Own one Bach song (he was my favorate!)
Anyway, I am now VERY close to being packed for UMass. Everything I will NEED the first week is in boxes with the exception of a few things that I have not bought yet.
Surprisingly, I actually find this year more liberating than last. I now know what I need (for the year) and what Can just stay home. Art supplies are almost completely none existant because of Graphic Design and Digital Media. Even the stressful Classes (iE TYPE I) seem to want to workout for Me. I am just having a really good feeling about this year, or at the least, this semester.

We pack up the Car tomorrow night and I am off 6am Sunday morning!

T_T Move in day fun T_T


p.s. sorry for any typos this was done on my tablet...I didn't feel like typing

Back Home, Leaving Soon

I am back home, for what short of a time this will be. Kate's house was a lot of fun! I have missed her a lot and am going to miss her again soon. She is a good friend to me and I appreciate everything she does for me. She, in fact, is one of the few people I would not be able to not be friends with.....

Reasons why:

• She is Honest (though some times blunt it is nice for her to say how she feels)
• She doesn't just think of only herself.
• She confides in me (THIS one is MY FAVORITE because she is really beginning to open up!)

Some times Kate can come off as a little cold, but I feel as though she is actually really sensitive. I know I scare her a bit, I do to everyone at times, but I think she understands that that is my way of dealing with things. It has been officialized that she IS NOT coming back to UMass though I am truly happy that she is in classes and is not just waiting around for next semester!

In other news I am beginning to get ready for my trip back to UMass. I completely forgot the fact that my mom had a doctor's appointment and would be home today or I wouldn't have asked for the special drop off to my sister's house. Either way I am glad because I get to see the babies before I go to school....more good news is my sister made my orthodontist appointment next Friday so I HAVE to come home for Abigail's birthday party!!!!
I am actually kind of scared for this new year. I still have to fix my schedule, I have to work with a new roommate and I have all of my friends so far away. I need to do well and I am not even sure if my schedule is going to work out! The only real good news is my mom HAS to get me some good cosmetics (and such) so I can "get along with my roommate"...BRILLIANCE! I already have some nice things from Kristen and I have a really cool nail thingy....i am going to buy more nail thingies!...lol

Kate's house, Day one

Today is day one of my weekend at Kate's house. I believe our game plan is going to the beach, but right now I am hanging around her Mom (and aunts') house while her mom does some construction with the other "adults" and Kate does some yard work with her brother (they work for a lady). I am wondering if I should have gone with Jake and Kate but I didn't want to hold them up because I was no where near ready this morning...I hear Mrs. Riddle's cell and I wonder if it is Kate, If it is I can't write long....Kate is on her way....
Any way, tomorrow we are going to the big BI (Kate talk for, Block Island) and I worked around the house all day Friday so my mom would give me the money for the ferry...anyway, I am going to need to go now..I will post later if I can!

What to bring

I have been conflicted on many things, as usual, and now I am starting to wonder what to bring.
One would expect this sentence to be finished with where I need to bring these items, but the answer is two places.
I need to find out what I am going to bring to not only school, but to Kate's house. Her mom is coming tomorrow night and I have no idea what to bring, or how long I am staying. I think I am going to be staying till Monday but she has not made that clear yet.... even so, these decisions are not as important as what I will be bringing for next semester....
I have decided to stop letting my hope out, that some miracle will happen and Kate is really my roommate, and move on to accepting the fact that Jackie is my new roommate. Even though this is what I am wishing for in the next school year, It is time I move on and stop saying it out loud. The maybes are really getting old and I will now start referring to Jackie as my roommate (unless the miracle happens of course!....lol).
Moving on, I am now in the process of deciding what things I am going to bring to school and what things are staying home. It is already clear that I am going to be taking 2 cars. My plan is to put mom and dad in the car with ALL of my linens and bedding (including pillows, foam thingys, and blankets), while everything else will be with kristen and me...
I have to go shopping anyway, so I plan on getting all of my "important" room things (and expensive things) into my room and bring up the bedding (it is light but takes up A LOT of space) later, hopefully making the part where EVERYONE is going to be moving in, less stressful for me. If I move in early enough maybe I will just walk to the car and get my bedding while I wait for a good time to get groceries!....either way there are things that my mom isn't going to want me to take (bike, rice cooker, DDR...) that I could not get for WEEKS before mom finally comes....sure I doubt the fact that mom won't be taking me home on the weekends, but I am not taking chances (and I am going to Sam's for dinner....in south bumbum)
Things I need to remember....
Last year I forgot my TOOTHBRUSH!!!

Soooo Confused!!!

At first the entry to this was suppose to be "My new roommate" because I had gotten a facebook message from a girl, Jackie, saying that she was my roommate and she had just gotten the letter, but now I am really confused because Kate's facebook says that she just got a letter on her class schedule.
What does this mean? I was just getting over the initial shock that confirmed all my hopes for Kate changing her mind on UMass and this comes up...I know this doesn't mean the classes are at UMass but she has not changed any of her things on facebook that says she is a UMass student.
I may have heard her talking about taking classes some where else but I have not heard anything in a long time. I am conflicted and still don't feel I should directly ask her. She will tell me when the time comes.
I did, however, ask her what her classes were. Hoping that this will get me the answers I need. I really have no idea what to think of this...I mean....what is going on that I had not been told....was she planning to tell me in person and that is why she is being so proactive on seeing me so soon (besides the fact we haven't seen each other for more than an hour since school).
URGGGGG..........Why must I hold on and hope all the time!....I am going to check my UMass email and see if I have any messages on this, and later I will check COIN!
~~~~~~~
Everything past this point is assuming that Kate is NOT going to UMass and I have Jackie as a roommate!
~~~~~~~
It seems as though Jackie and I are going to get along fine. She is friends with Amber and our talking online is going well. I am going to be taking the fridge, vacuum, DDR and my rice cooker and she is going to be taking the microwave and the tv. The only thing that concerns me is the fact that she is a UMass cheerleader. I know this shouldn't concern me in college, but this means I have to stay neat and clean! I need to look presentable because she seems to be the type where that is important.
Though this works in my favor because now my mom HAS to get me the cleaning things that I want AND some cosmetics that I want so my roommate and I will get along....This could also be a good thing because we may go to the gym together some days and I will get use to keeping a clean room as well as not being a scum bag!
...We will see how this all works out....this is the most probable....

Big Oops

Today was the day where I have made my first mistake on the road (alone) when I actually got yelled at by the other driver.
I was sure I had made a mistake right after I took the action, but I had already started changing lanes so I knew it was too late. The other car that would have been behind me changed lanes because what I didn't notice (or think of) was the light in front of us changing from green to yellow. So upon making my lane switch, I had to slow down soon after....Giving the couple pulled up behind me at a pretty fast speed before they switched over, I had done a big no no....and...I sat waiting to get yelled at. I knew it was coming....
I had unintentionally cut them of and was sitting, just staring infrount of me as the man in the passenger seat was yelling....I still don't know now if he was talking directly to me or to the driver but I was freaking out a little bit.
I know this is no excuse but I have only had my license for a year and really didn't start actively driving until a couple of months ago (and a couple of weeks alone). Though I am glad that I got yelled at because if they didn't yell at me I wonder if I would be as careful next time not to do it again. Even though I knew I did something wrong wile driving, would I have reacted the same way if I didn't get yelled at.....
I am still a little buzzed from it and was really glad when some one pulled in front of me when I was going towards the second light.
So that is what I learned today....Pay more attention when switching lanes....though the ride home was more fun because no one would let me over till I was almost at my street...though I was not in the way that time because of the fact, the guy behind me probably got stuck at the light and gave me just enough time to do what I needed to....

That was the big event.....I will talk on the shower later....hopefully I won't forget!

The Fair

As I stated yesterday, I went to the fair this evening. We did not do much (in fact we almost didn't go at all!) Abigail has a couple of new stuffed animals and I think I got screwed by the dart people (one of those booths) so nothing surprising. I did pretty well on the darts though...at least better than I had expected.
I have also decided to save the drawing of Roma and Micheal till the wedding....and I still have so much to do ....coolio....going to bed soon.....dont know when....but soon.....

Weekend with Kriddle

I am REALLY excited about next weekend because I have just made plans to stay over my friend Kate's house (in Charlstown)! I, quote "don't have a choice in the matter" which means there is no way I can not go! She had origianlly invited me for this weekend because we are suppose to be meeting up at the Washington County Fair tomorrow night because Josh Gracin is playing (I have seen him once before at the story teller concerts at cat country 98.1) Any way this should all be really fun!
Other events for this weekend are the drawing I have been putting off, I really NEED to do it tomorrow, and Roma's (my cousin Micheal's future wife) wedding shower. The shower is the real reason that I could not go to Kate's house this weekend and she could not understand why I HAVE to go....I had also called up my mom earlier this evening and told her the same thing....it does not seem like my mom understands either.
It is not any other reason but family. I explained to Kate that my dad's brother (and family) is his only living relative and it is very important to all of us to stay in touch. Even though I may have four cousins on my dad's side (not including their children) they only have two. Family is really important as it is, and we really don't have a large family! Let's not even mention that I would like her to go to my bridal shower one day, and it would be rude of me to ask her if I can't bother for hers. I like Roma a lot, she is really cool (and a photographer!) and also...I missed Christmas with the family and we did not do easter!
I still have all my projects and no idea how to finish them all. Here is a list of things that I need to do off the top of my head!

1. Wednesday Jamie is coming over and I am drawing her in a ballet pose...
2. By Wednesday I would also like to have Jamie's dress finished (that I now have a design plan to).....
3. As well as a clean room
4. I need to find my swim suite
   
5. I need to make Melinda, Sam and my hat!!!
6. I need to make Amber's shirt
7. I need to make a list of things I need for school
8. I need to fix my purple bike (it is older)....make a rack as well
   
9. and I need to pack

All of these things, listed, don't seem that bad, but really this is so much stuff I need to get done int a small amount of time. I am wondering if I am going to be able to go over Kristen's house at all till my projects are done....It really all depends on when move in day is, I may not even pack till the day before.
What I do know is how long these things are going to take....Depending on how well the dress goes, it can be a half day to a day project, the shirt about the same. The hats I can finish in less time and, even assuming it takes as long as it did on the plane, I should be able to get these all done in a day for each........GAAA it seems like I have no time, but in the same thought I have almost two weeks!!!

P.S. Thinking about doing one of those movies where I make it go really really fast for cleaning my room....maybe doing it with all "big" projects and then I can post them up and it will be like my life quick...though the room would have to be taken from hours of film.....I would really like to do move in day, but, I doubt it would work unless I left all of my stuff out and then had my mom leave so I could set up my room and unpack...I guess I could make it shorter by having the movie about how I RE-arrange the stuff back to how I want it
.....
I still hope that Kate will end up (magically) at school on the first day, I keep having dreams of her moving into Pine Dale with me. I was talking about it with Kristen because I feel bad feeling this way....She said that not everything is rational and even though it is there doesn't mean it is bad........I feel like pleading with Kate to stay in school every day, but I also feel that my actions would be clouded by the fact that I would also LOVE to have her as my roommate!...but that is enough confliction for today

The new plan

Today Kristen was able to supply me with the oven clay I need to start my new line of things I am trying to sell. Right now I am going to make pendents, charms (on bracelets?) and stitch markers....I am hoping that these will look better and I will finally have found something that will put my crafts in the positives.
Also, I am going to possibly take a jewelry class next semester, thought this all depends on weather or not my classes switch over, and if my teacher's are ok with me leaving early and being late!

RECAP ON FLORIDA:
I said that I would state what went on in Florida in my next entry.....
What happened was practically nothing. It was basically four days hanging out with my mom and grandfather. It also marked (at the end) the time where I would finally get all of my self projects done....I am realizing now I didn't have as much time as I had thought.
The good news is I do have a set date for at the least one thing. I am going to draw Jamie (my neighbor) on Wednesday of next week. By the time I do that I would like to have a dress done for her....this all just makes me realize how I don't have much time before school starts!

Decisions

While I was in Florida this weekend I had finally made a decision on what I am going to do with my classes.
Even though I HATE the thought of only having 5 classes I came up with a way I can feel better about it and make my weekends more durable. In stead of my 6 hour class on Friday (we are talking from like 9-2:50) I will be changing the class time to Tuesday and Thursday nights. This clears up my weekdays so I can now sign up for the Honor's Art History I have been trying to get into. The only issue now is having a night class every day in the week.
Though, this could also work out for the best. All night classes could give me the potential to only work during my favorite hours AND I could talk to my teachers about getting me a temporary copy of CS3. I want to write more tonight but I am also very tired....so I will fill in my details later....

Ordered

Today is the day that I was finally able to pay for my Kimono. It is a very satisfying feeling, though I still fear that I could have made the wrong choice, but I do not regret it. I am hoping that I will receive it next week before I have to go to Florida, and hopefully during the day. I can't wait to finally own a kimono...I just hope I can make myself a nice obi.
The rest of the day wasn't too eventful. I saw my teacher and am going to start re-writing/illustrating my children's book tomorrow. I have a lot of planning and drawing to do and I can't wait to use full color potential in creating this book. It is going to be a lot of work but hopefully the time wont deter from it. I plan on sending it to a company when I am finished...maybe....it is only a school project so I am not going to think of it much!......
pps....Abigail has decided I am "Nyaaant"......lol....

My new, old love...

My sister had been playing Puzzle Pirates for a while now and it is a game that we had been playing a couple of years ago, but kept stopping on and off. It was a game that I had always enjoyed, but it takes up a lot of your time when you have something to do. Like all games some people take it a bit too serious and, as I remember, have no sympathy when your mom calls.
Still, it is a wonderful game that I have always enjoyed. It is like a constant puzzle game that just keeps getting better and better, the better the people on your ship are the easier your game will be, but as people leave different tasks can get more difficult.

In other news, I had my picnic with Carol on Monday and it went well. We both made meals and put them in our bento boxes (but for me it was just square Tupperware). We also had cought some hermit crabs in the disgusting (like it is literally "closed" because of the bacteria....it made our legs itch!) waters of the City Park Beach. Here is a link to the bacteria levels! We also had done some hand games and decided not to paint because of the setting up hassle. My new easel is a PAIN to set up....though I do need to start painting soon!

Tuesday's class went well, my teacher and I seem to have a better relationship ever since she found out I can write well. I don't even know if it is related, but that class was the turning point! I have also realized that I have ONE more week left!!! I didn't even notice it until last class. The only problem is I still have to do my illustrator study AND write (and illustrate) my children's book. I need to come up with an idea before my meeting tomorrow, with my teacher, or I will ask to use the story I wrote in class.
I wasn't going to do this but another student is using the guideline she made for her story.

This also means that I am going to Florida In a little over a week, I have a flight at 7am (I need to get there at 5) on the 8th. This may also suck because it is RIGHT after my last class....this means I MUST pack ahead of time...I am not going to like this whole, going to bed thing either. I really do hate going to bed.
The bad news is, because my mother is leaving on like the 6th, I have to go on the plane alone O_O.......ahhhh.....I am always worried when a plane goes off, but now I have to do it next to some one I have never met before..........Q_Q....luckily my mom is coming home the same time as me on the 11th.
The good news is it may get me back into a schedule for school.

I really miss school, and I am hopping, it is another chance at a new start (God knows I have had plenty of those.) I hope, as always, to finally get the things done that had never quite been scratched off of my "To Do" list. I really need to get some thing better out of this year and learn to focus on things that I want. For some reason I cannot translate my motivational thoughts into action. I get really distracted with everything around me and forget what my plans were...

Now is the time I mention my kimono, I was suppose to have paid for it by now but paypal WILL NOT let me use my money until I have a bank account hooked up. So, I am waiting for the confirmation to go through (still) so I can send the payment to the seller. I have contacted him/her and told of my delema and they have no problem with waiting a couple extra days. I mean....I have the money it is just I can't use it till the thing goes through.....this should be between now and Friday/Saturday.

List of things I really need to Do

1. Lose this extra weight and get in shape!!! Really, I need to take better care of myself as well as take some pressure off my back before I need a breast reduction because of my stomach size!
2. Get A boyfriend. Even though my mom is incorrect in assuming that if I do not get a boyfriend this year I will never get a boyfriend, doesn't mean that it isn't plausible. I will not go looking ecstatically, but my eyes will be open just in case
3. GET MY BRA BACK FROM SAM.....Seriously now I might "atleast not only have one" but it is my ONE black bra....my clothes (black) don't look right with the tan one and one of my tan ones is in really bad shape. My bras cost A LOT of money and it isn't because I have a choice. I don't know what I am going to do about this situation but I AM getting it back the first week of school!
4. Getting a job. This one I am not to sure about for during the school year. I will be working for Ryan (the glass guy in New Bedford) but I feel like I should be doing more, I have applied to Fridays and am going to apply to other places around the Dartmouth and (preferably) New Bedford area. p.s. With the loop I can literally walk a shorter distance than places in Dartmouth

Other things include keeping my dorm room clean and getting organized. Doing well.....these things shouldn't have to be written, they are almost expected....
Also I forgot to put that I will also be applying to drive the DartVan. This way I will have lots of driving experience (especially with people) while I am getting paid for it. This way mom CAN'T say I haven't had enough experience.

WON

So I won the kimono auction, but........paypal won't let me send the money I have on it until I add a bank account, so.........I NEED TO FIND OUT HOW TO SEND IT BEFORE THE 3 DAY TIME IS UP!

Buisness and Work

I have decided to post because I had some time between now and when I am going to bid on the Kimono that I have had my eye on (ebay)....
I feel like I am not doing well when it comes to business. My etsy has not really had any sales and I really expected to do better. I am hoping, as I make new products, I will be able to find out what it is that will make me some money. I feel stressed about it, and I wonder if I am meant to make money. It has never really been a concern for me because I never wanted anything that badly. I still don't really care that much but, I would like some spending money next school year. There were so many things I was suppose to get this summer. I had plans to fix my moms car, get a new warentee on my Macbook, and (the first $500) Photoshop.
So far this summer, I have a plus 5$ towards my Photoshop fund :(. I am really scared that something is going to happen to my computer and I wont be able to fix it too.....just .....arrrgggg!
Also I keep giving myself these HUGE projects for Lit. They are things I enjoy doing but sometimes I wonder what I was thinking. The movie I am making for my presentation is JUST NOW starting to come together. I am barley done and I can't really focus on it. I WILL have it done but it seems like a million years away!
If I get nothing more out of this summer I wish to do well in this class and make some money for college (and some side money Mom doesn't know about would be great too!) I have been thinking up some ideas on what I can sell and I will post them as I get supplies....
bidding time now...I will post again soon!

Patterns

I have noticed something about all the blogs that I do. A pattern starts to form and it can either lead to endless cycles or the end of my regular blogging.
At first things become very new and exciting. All expieriences must be explained and are interesting. These are the first times that the situations are written so it can be interesting, but over time the same things happen over and over. Writing about some thing 80 different times just doesn't sound like fun!

There are really days like today that nothing goes on, or I don't feel like blogging about something......they are days when I choose not to and lose my mojo for when something cool happens.....

Tomorrow may be fun, Carol and I may do a bento lunch followed by some painting...I already have something in mind!

Boys and Girls

I really wonder if there is still a difference between the way boys and girls are brought up.
Today I went out with my friend Ashly, who is moving to Arizona in a little over a day, and her friends to see the movie The Dark Knight. At the show we had a good time. We meant to go to the 715 showing but everyone was running late so it was decided that we would go to the 10 oclock show. The only problem was that we had to wait an extra 3 hours before the movie would start but that wasn't much of a problem.
Jessica, Ashly's friend, had brought coupons for EVERYONE and we were all able to see the movie for 7 dollars in stead of 10 so I was able to take part in some of the activities. First we all tried to get a Hulk toy with one of those claw machines and then we decided to take a trip to McDonalds (where I had also applied!).
Wile we were there Jessica pulls out an Entertainment book where we all have many options for coupons. There was one for a McFlurry so I asked anyone if they would split the buy one get one free with me and we would both get it half off. Ashly agreed and I had thought, when speaking to her about it, I had made clear that we were splitting it and this included the price. I found out my assumption was wrong when I was paying and asked her for the last dollar I needed (really 80cents) and she told me she only had fives....and Jessica was nice and pulled out her large change purse and gave the cashier the money (this girl is THRIFTY!!!) Any way, this annoyed me but was not the highlight of the evening that brings the boy, girl topic up...
We watched the movie and I called my mom the second we were leaving my seats so, assuming everyone waited with me, it would not be too long, and we all went outside. There everyone talked for a minute and then, after saying goodbye to Ashly, went their separate ways.
This is where I got annoyed, but I wasn't going to say anything. The girls up and LEFT. I mean, is it wrong that I assume they wait with me instead of leaving me ALONE in an empty parking lot at 1230 in the MORNING? I know it isn't my place to say what they should do but....really....it is dangerous for girls to be out alone....
What I did notice though is the boys stuck around in the parking lot for a very long time. Even though they had a reason that they gave me (will be told in a few seconds) they were there an awful long time, and that made me think that they were waiting to make sure I was getting home.
Another thing that almost confirmed this is, after about 10-15 minutes, the boys had driven up in their car and asked me if I had a ride. After I said my mom was coming they paused and after an awkward silence told me a story of how they walked up to the car and wondered what was on their windshield to find a magazine....later finding out it was porn! Even after that we stared awkwardly until they decided to leave.
This is the difference that I have noticed. Boys that I had seen as rude (on Ashly's birthday one of them had ordered the most expensive things on the menu.....Ashly's parents were paying) had, from what I can see, waited to make sure the girl was okay. Even though they still left early they took the time to make sure I was going to be alright and tried to stay as long as they thought was possible without admitting what they were doing.
I do not know if I am reading the situation different than it was, but I like it better this way. It shows that boys still know that they need to watch out for a girls protection. I am all for being independent, but it doesn't mean we are safe from the danger of rapists and killers. We still have a disadvantage over men.
Though I do find it strange that, as girls, they didn't stay with me knowing that.....

Japanese Envelopes

I have officially come up with a new craft that I am selling. Japanese style envelopes are really cool and different and I really enjoyed decorating/making these! I am really proud of these so I am posting them....oh and ps ....
I am changing from lov.li to etsy because lov.li has NO traffic and HORRIBLE service...I can go days without being able to access my account! etsy has a better rep so I am there! I will be deleting my lov.li account as soon as it will let me (I can't sign in again!!!)
Any way my new site link is here and also on my left panel!

Tanabata

I was on wikipedia and I found some AWESOME news...now I need to adjust because of how cool this is. The date of August seventh that I had picked (because July seventh had passed and it is sometimes celebrated on that day) is actually the correct date for this year! The date on the Gregorian calender will not be the same until 2019! I copied this from the artical
"

Date

The original Tanabata date was based on the Japanese lunisolar calendar, which is about a month behind the Gregorian calendar. As a result, some festivals are held on July 7, some are held on a few days around August 7, while the others are still held on the seventh day of the seventh lunar month of the traditional Japanese lunisolar calendar, which is usually in August in the Gregorian Calendar.

The Gregorian dates of "the seventh day of the seventh lunar month of the Japanese lunisolar calendar" for the coming years are:

• 2008-08-07
• 2009-08-26
• 2010-08-16
• 2011-08-06
• 2012-08-24 (The Chinese date is 2012-08-23 because of the time difference.)
• 2013-08-13
• 2014-08-02
• 2015-08-20
• 2016-08-09
• 2017-08-28
• 2018-08-17
• 2019-08-07
• 2020-08-25"

Neglecting...

It feels as though I have been neglecting a lot of things lately, one of which being my blog. It feels like nothing has really happened, but in this time so much has gone on. I had not worked on my Japanese until yesterday, and I feel like maybe it is time to start up my routines again.
So far I have a long to do list:

1. Clean my room
2. Work on my book
3. Get up to date in Japanese
4. Get a penpal from Japan
5. Keep up my blog
6. Make some money for school

So far, I have done almost nothing. My room has gone down the drain and is steadily getting bad again.
I have not worked on my book AT ALL since the last chapter and am now very behind.
Though I have gotten closer, I am still a week behind on my Japanese...There is good news to this and it is that I can form sentences! I can also understand many things. I have contacted a girl looking for a penpal (snail mail) and I am looking forward to it.
I have also gotten a mini job, I am made a tshirt for this girl on craigslist and am getting 50 dollars for it (though my parents think it is like 30 in case there is something I need that mom wont buy) I did a very good job considering how hard it was, though I keep going back and forth on weather or not I should give the character a face. I will post a picture of it on a later date.
I have also decided, once I receive the money for it, I will be switching from lov.li to etsy. As much as I like lov.li I am getting NO traffic and I need to sell this stuff so I can pay for school!
Any way, I am hoping things will look better, and they have stated already! Although Ashly is moving next week I will be seeing her soon and I finally got a message from Teri! Also Carol and POSSIBLY Teri will be celebrating the Japanese star festival (tanabata-たなばた) with me on August 7th (but might not on that date because it is my last day of class and Carol works till 2) Any way, It should be really fun! I plan to write my wish in Japanese on a piece of paper similar to what is used in Japan, but don't ask me what it is because I am not telling!

Politically Correct

If there is one thing that I have always hated it is political correctness. It just does not make any sense. Most people either have it taught to them or they are very bitter about something in their lives. I believe that in most cases, people find politically correct phrases, books, and words to help them avoid a confrontation that is bound to happen any way. For some reason people have trouble accepting differences, but at the same time try to be "more open" about making everyone equal.
The reason why this post, or rant, is being written is because of the aggravation that I had to suffer through in my English classroom. I did not notice how bad my proffessor was until recently. The "PC" is getting so out of hand it is making them see problems in illistrations that are artistically correct. They are over examining things until I finally chime in and they all end up being speechless.
I am going to start this story off by saying that I have no problem with ANY one's race, color, or belief. To be honest we are all different hues of the same color and people really need to get over this.
Any way, my class was reading a book about "the great migration" and we were speaking about how the illustrations were made. My professor was saying that the black people were being shown as oppressed because of the time period and she found that strange because the illustrator was a black man. She also went on talking about how they really don't make sense and how the man only put the details in the white man's face. ...
First of all, artistically she is very wrong. I don't know if I am "qualified" to say this but there are three things that happened in that artist's mind.

1. This is my primary statement...the one I gave to my professor...by having the black people in the groups with out faces they were turned in to a group as a whole. Being a mass movement these things were happening to all of the people and the book never talks about an individual...when the white men are in the scenes they need their expressions to give a highlight to how they are feeling and they were the main focus of the statement......
2. The artist was not an anal retentive person who wanted to draw ALL of the faces
3. The illustrations would look HORRIBLE if all the faces were in focus

I have noticed so many things and it is soo hard to bite my tung during her long discussions where the class, with her guidance, decides that they are oppressing someone in the book. She also hates books about

• girlie girls
• manly or bratty boys
• white middle class stories
• anything that has "stario types"

Seriously, IT DOESN'T MATTER. These stores are girlie or whatever so they can be sold to a particular audience. They are the author's story and they don't have a right to say the author was a "hater" ...this whole thing just pisses me off! I think the worst thing was saying that the over proportioned Disney characters were "disgusting" Yes they are kind of out there but they aren't telling girls to look like that, they are made that way so they are more appealing...normal proportions in a Disney movie just wouldn't be as affective and if you don't want your kids to think that TEACH THEM!
Last class she was telling us to filter out books because of what the "underlying message" is and this class she was talking about how bad Hannah Montana (given she is partially right with the new episodes) and cheetah girls didn't dress their age or worry about school it is all singing and glam. In the Hannah Montana episodes from last year (I liked it better when it wasn't cool) she HAD to do her home work and keep up grades and HAD to stay in school and obey her dad. ..all of her statements didn't actually have research to them so I am deducting....based on observation...that she is bitter. I am not sure why yet, but she is bitter about something.
(more ranting that takes away from the strength of this blog but has to be said)
Maybe she wasn't popular in school? I don't know, but she needs to stop looking for things wrong with stories, girls don't have to read "girl books" if they don't want and boys don't have to read "boy books." She was saying how the boys in some URI program would some times come in with faerie outfits and no one said anything because it wasn't allowed. Alone this sentence is fine but when you are talking about a book that is sent to girls making the boys feel left out....wtf....any way things we get out of today

• Do what you want and mind your own business.
• Leave artists and writers alone and stop looking for problems with how they are oppressing someone.
• Everyone may be equal but we are all DIFFERENT and people are going to be offended. Learn to let the little things go and worry about, I don't know, the consideration of others!
  

Selling Jewelry

I have OFFICIALLY found a Jewelry selling site I like...in lov.li I can sell jewelry without paying until I actually sell something...this is very good because my no one can find the "internet credit card" any way, check it out! I have about 20 pieces up

So much and so little

I have been really bad about updating lately and I have been doing so well on this blog. The issue is balancing children's lit with all of my daily activities is making my days pretty busy, but uneventful.
So far I have done NO Japanese, NO jewelry, and I still have to take the pictures and eventually clean my room. There is just so much yet so little. I really don't think I am going to be able to go to the Rascal Flatts concert thing on Friday because I don't think I will be anywhere near ready (I am going to have to call Kristen About that later), though I do think I will draw them any way...I have wanted to do a celebrity but I couldn't think of any that I wanted.
One thing I did do is design a quick t-shirt. I found this website off of craigslist and thought "hey, why not do something quick just for fun." and I did, soon voting should be available, if I don't suck, and then my shirt can be produced!....though I am weary because it was a quicky!

Projects and Turmoils

I was really impressed with myself yesterday for not over eating, especially since it was the forth of July! Normally on holidays I snack myself into a binge because everything looks so good, but, for the first time in my life, I have binged on the day after the holiday.
It isn't much of binging, more of I didn't start eating till about 2:30 (didn't feel like it) then ended up doing most of my eating over Kristen's house. We ended up going out to eat at Rigatoni's with my Brother-in-law's (Eric) cousin (Shena [?]) then we ended up going to, our love shop, Rita's. I ended up feeling very full and both Kristen and I gave our leftovers to Eric, making him a regular sized....kind of...
I was going to call Carol up when we went out but we were not out long enough to have her waste her time. I have not seen her since the last time we went to city park and it is going to be very hard to fit her in with her work schedule. I feel like I haven't had time for any one lately, I haven't seen Ashly (and she is moving to Arizona) and I also haven't really seen anyone from school. The worst of them all is Teri whom I haven't seen since graduation.
What I really need for these connections are what have been giving me troubles all along. I need not only a car, but also a job. This would make it easier to have my friends and I hang out so that way I don't need to tell them my house if off bounds....I also really need a good hang out spot....loitering at the Rhode Island Mall and City Park are about the only things I can afford right now. N o one will hire me, and so far I haven't been able to sell my stuff because my ebay account is on hold, as well as my paypal
the only thing I have really gotten done is a photoshop thing I did on my eye for my book. I am still behind on my book and my Japanese....but those are all on hold till I finish my homework...
p.s also retaking all pictures of my jewelry that are dark....the dark background does them no justice! The funny thing is all of this is to get CS3 so I don't need to use elements....

Gone Fishing

I was starting off the day grumbling to myself about how I had to go to the lake this year, and every year. Kristen reminded me that, sometimes, it was awkward because people walk up to you and ask how you are and all you can think is "Who are you..." everyone is very grown up and I saw some people I use to know in high school (in passing) who I had apparently known since I was little.
It is very strange how people change over time, I could barley recognize anyone when I got there, but as I read the name tags, faces started to become femilure. The biggest problem was my mom feeling the need to tell everyone how and why I didn't want to go earlier. Seriously what the hell, even after I told her why I was angry with her and that she shouldn't have said that to them...she even goes off telling "Uncle" Mickey all of how I shouldn't have told her....I don't think she understands, or cares ?, how much that hurt him hearing that.
Any way, there are things this year that I never really noticed that much. All of the little things over time really made a huge difference. The tree that an old swing was on got cut down, the swing was then moved to a place where a climbing rope use to go....the whole inside was renovated, causing one year of us not going, and so many other things like a new boat. I was looking around at how everyone changed. I suddenly remembered why I loved the place and looked forward to it. One thing didn't change, "Winkey" still ran around helping everyone out. I realize that she really does A LOT and runs just about EVERYTHING.
THE BEST NEWS....the water isn't disgusting like last year...it is back to normal
Things I did today:

• Went to the lake hoping Kate would call and we could go out afterwards...I was in the area
• Mingled....
• Made Jewelry (really need to update my site now!)
• Planned a panorama picture of the lake(...need to figure out how to )
  
• FISHING...didn't plan on it but Dad was out and I went with
• Ate....mmmmm
• Played pool...AND beat dad 2 out of 3! mwhahahahhaha
• Left and called Kate realizing we couldn't go out ....sadness....and went home
• Drove to Fred's to pick up Dad's perscription and Dan's to pick up Mom's paper

Not much but it was entertaining! I am also learning Sweet Home Alabama on my guitar and my fingers kill....so I am going to stop!

10 Things we learn from movies:Ten Things I Hate About You

1. If a teacher will confiscate pot, he WILL go for your Cheetoes!
2. Diversions are made for women
3. Social outcasts make good couples
4. People are not always as they appear
5. You never want to have a father who is an OB
6. Green eyes CAN induce vomiting
7. If you kick a guy hard enough....well.....watch the movie
8. Background scenes (like green screen) were only so realistic recently.....*boat scene*
9. Everyone needs someone
10. Your guidance councilor is probably writing a dirty old lady book and wants YOU to give her some kinky adjectives!
    

IDK

I really do not know what to put into todays post...I have decided that I need to retake all of the pictures of the darker glass necklaces because you can barley see the glass in the pictures.......also I am having HUGE writers block on my homework assignment and need to talk to my teacher on weather or not it is too close to the original book....gaaaa

Pricing and School

Surprisingly these things are not quite related. The pricing has to do with my dealing with how much I would like to charge on my jewelry. I think, for these ones (because they are my firsts) I am going to sell them for like 15 dollars. Eventually when I start using real meterials (like silver) I can charge more and they will look better.
I came to this conclusion because of how I work with the materials, they seem to come fast and easy and I am making like 4 a day and I still could make more... Updates to where they are going...the blue one is to Carol and the Brown one is still planned for ebay.
School is the dificult part in all of this. Children's lit has a lot more work than I had thought. The only good news is I get to write a couple of kids books in the process. I am going to write my first one on coral castle and how it is to walk around. It is suppose to be in the style of Dilly's Summer Camp Diary by Cynthia Copeland Lewis which could end up being really cool...I just don't know where to start. I am debating on just going page by page. Most, if not all, of this will be done on the computer...I just wish I had CS3 to do it on, then my life would be easy!

To Grandmother's House I Go

I was sent to my grandmother's house last night and it was essentially without my permission. I know I need to see my grandmother more often and I really should volunteer it up, but really now. My mom keeps telling my grandmother that I am going to go over her house so that way she can get rid of me, but I am really sick of it. I really have no other plans though you would think I would be informed on this plan.
The good news was my Mom's aunt saw the Jewelry I had been making and I was able to turn a crystal into a pendent for her. I will be giving it to "Aunt June" (June isn't her real name, but i don't know her real name because it is really funky) any way, I am wondering if I am using too many spirals in my patterns. I really enjoy this abstraction, though my parents are now telling me I need to make "K"s on the back of all of them, and I think that would just take away from the work. They say everyone can do it like that, but I like them the way they are!

Jewery

Today I have been figuring out how to bind the glass jewelry in a professional way, so that way I can have that job during the school year. I think today was very successful and I made a few nice pieces. The triangle was my first, then the long one, then the green one and then the one with a dangling piece. The green one is totally mine and the two piece I made for my mom, who is going to pay me back with supplies to make more.
This is a cool new project and I can't wait to make more!

Blogs and Dad

I was looking through my bookmarks (in order to organize them) and I found a couple of blogs from last year or so that I had been interested in reading more of but never got a chance to do it. The really cool is they are also supported on blogger and now I can add them to the things I watch.
The first one is "Unbelievable Stuff." the first post I read was about the five year old girl in th 1930s who got pregnant at the ripe age of five (and had been having regular menstral cycles since the age of three, to give more info if you click the link her parents had thought it was abdominal bleeding...I may or may not have googled it some time later). I really look forward to reading more about these things as time goes on.
The second blogger is "Extra Ordinary Things" I can't exactly remember what I was reading with this one but there are a lot of really cool things on this site. Though some of the more recent postings are a bit risque.
...
In other news my dad really ticked me off last night, mainly because he wants me to have a job but doesn't count people who want to hire me (ie babysitting) a job. Also he isn't respecting the fact that my art is my work and that the things I am doing now are the things I am going to need for the rest of my life. I don't believe my parents understand the art field because they keep telling me things that are not necessarily true (Like saying Japanese is useless to me) and listening to all the things that he said, I now understand why I spent most of my artistic life uninspired.
I was told on National Portfolio Day a couple of years ago that I was really good but there was nothing behind my pictures. It felt to (I am guessing the UMass professor) Bruce that I had no passion and I didn't know what to say about that. Art is a part of who I am but I cannot really do what I want with it. It was always either too messy or it was money that wasn't going to be spent.
My dad was saying that you can still make great artwork if you are uber clean; I disagree with this. It came up when I said work comes out better when you get a little dirty. My dad went on saying how his father could paint a window with a four inch brush cleaner and faster than people could with a one inch brush and he was spotless and....so much more.
I still disagree, there is a HUGE difference between painting art and a window. My best drawings I came out with a little bit of charcoal on my hands.

Yesterday

I am very happy that yesterday I ended up planning a post and scheduling it ahead of time, because I ended up going out and staying past my normal posting time, but a lot of things have happened since then...
Right now I deciding on moving into my sister's house for the summer. The reason why this is different than what is going on now is it will be more obvious and everyone will understand what is going on. My parents are very stressed, and my mom especially, seems to be more stressed now that I am living at home.
I am very torn about that situation because I like being home. Though I also like staying at Kristen's house. They are both home and I really don't think I can deal with just one of them. Also I think it would really bother my father if I just move out. I am really leaning on the side of keeping my spot in both places. I am over Kristen's house a good amount of time during the week, and I am also getting my alone time in my house at home.
I am really a person who likes to set her roots in the ground. Moving around so much really bothers me, mostly because I have already set my roots, for now, in my home. My mom blames all of our problems on the house and really just wants to get out and move on. And although I hate my room as it is now (way to much 2 year old meets 50 year old) it still has the potential to get better....I think I really just need to change rooms in my house at home...maybe I should even ask to move in the basement. It would suck when I had to go to the bathroom, and eat, but I could probably get away with using my school fridge and using the cubical my dad got me for the basement. I am really not sure what I am doing, but I need to decide soon.

10 Things we learn from movies:Wizard of Oz

1. You hit a witch (with your house) you get cool shoes
2. Bad things happen when monkeys fly
3. There is a reason why villains smell...they are soluble, thus cannot take baths
4. Yellow brick roads will lead to good things
5. If you are a little rusty, just add oil
6. Home is always three clicks away
7. Always watch for the hanging munchkin
8. Men in makeup=ICU
9. A crown is no match for a wand
10. The original Twister
    

JOB!!!

I still really like where this dress, that I am making Abigail, is going. I still will not post it until it is finished because it is too much of a crop job for me to handle. My only wish is that I was more careful about it because it is really becoming a nice dress that fits Abigail. Sure Kristen May believe it is "Amish gone wild" but I am growing very fond of it.
Also, I called the man from that glass company today to find out what I should be planning for. Luck was on my side when he didn't answer and I left my first error free message. I was actually pretty proud of my clear voice, but I still didn't answer when he had called back, but my plans changed when he called me earlier.
He was really interested in my work, but he was concerned that there wasn't a lot of jewelry pieces. I told him I had done a lot of bead work in high school and I planned on learning what I needed to learn over the summer. He stressed the importance of the work looking professional when it is completed because the glass is very brilliant.
Another cool story behind it is, the glass is from an old factory that burned down. A bunch of old women got together and dug up all of the pieces. They polished and plan on helping me in whatever way they can. I am really excited because this will be a wonderful experience for the possibility of jewelry design. Also it will be yet another skill to add to my resume/portfolio.
And in the last bit of news possible I AM GETTING A HELLO KITTY CREDIT CARD!!! Also, possibly, a visa check card and check book....oh yea!
Things are looking up again!

Over Kristen's Again

This morning, or should I say afternoon, I got a call from Kristen asking if I would like to go over her house. After a long debate with myself I decided that it would probably be good for me because I am starting to become anti social again. Also, Kristen had finally decided on what she wanted to do with her blog and made it about her weight loss journey. I especially like her new header "fat without the ph."
I have also decided I should give Gwen her portrait (as seen in yesterday's post) and as you all know I have finished my portraiture site, though I do wish I could have more portraits for my "examples" section. I didn't want to put any of my old things because my style has dramatically changed since the last time I had done drawings like these.
There is also a three way tie on my poll! I urge any one who hasn't already voted to definably make a vote because I am really still indecisive on what to make my weekly (Thursday) themed post about. Also tonight I plan on working on my book for a little bit so I can post the next chapter as soon as possible.
Abigail hasn't been sleeping well so I will not be able to post this until a later date, but I got bored last night and randomly cut and sewn fabric until I basically ended up with a dress up dress. I will post it as soon as I am done fixing it up. Because when you randomly cut and sew it ends up very choppy!

Eventful Days

Today I had a plan to do nothing but relax and hang around the house, but I ended up doing a really cool portrait instead. I had written, as a comment, on one of Gwen's facebook pictures that I was going to draw her. I saw this picture and it was cute so I saved it on my computer and waited until I felt like drawing.
I woke up this morning looked around for food, and after I finally found some cereal to eat I was going through my stuff and had an urge to finally draw that picture (above). This is really good because I can't really use my site for portraits until I have a good amount of examples, so I am going to keep practicing on my friends and family. Maybe I will even draw a celebrity or two.
The real hight-light, more of a climax, of the day was right after I set up my stuff to play DDR my dad came home and really flipped out. I mean it would be understandable if when he said "Take it off the TV your mother doesn't want it on there" and I didn't listen, but I got yelled at for not listening when I was unplugging the system. I am really not happy at this because he clearly came home angry and took it out on me. I am still really angry, but I am calm enough now where it won't affect me.
In more news Samantha sent me a language learning website that I find very helpful. You can sign up for free mini courses and practice and then take tests for yourself. It is called Livemocha.com and I did my first two Japanese lesions last night and it really helped with some of my sentence structure questions. The only issue I have, which is actually a good thing, is you have to figure out how to write the sentences on your own because they just show the sentence, and if you ask it will tell you what it means. though I did find it cool that they wrote some things in kanji and I had to figure out the simple letters just by listening.
Though we will really see how helpful it is when I finish my 50 "class hours." I just hope I can still keep up when I start my Children's Lit. class next week!

Tired

Even though I had woken up very late (like 1 O_O) I still feel very tired today, I believe it is the mixture of the party last night and the fact that we haven't eaten anything really good for us....like...burgers all day, ewww (only because I have had barley anything else all day)
Though today was still very productive. I drove the highway for the first time and didn't die, even my mom was at ease during our drive. The only issue I seem to have is getting distracted and cutting into lanes, though it is ok because this only happens when there is no one else on the road and I relax....I will lose that habit soon...
Other news is I used iWeb to make two websites for myself. One is for my portfolio and the other is for my portraiture. Even though iWeb works great I realize the importance of adobe flash when making a website...I am actually starting to miss it.
In other news classes at CCRI start in a week, which means my night class will soon be in session Tuesday and Thursday 6:15-9:35!

Ashley's party

I really had a lot of fun at Ashly's (Melinda's sister) party today! Though, I have almost completely worn myself out...We had a moon bounce and got to swim in her chlorine free pool (I am going to need to see how that is possible later!)...the water was very soft.... Any way, the cake was amazing, three layers and completely edible (picture above). I am not sure of the place but they ordered it from Boston! I also think it was like a three hundred dollar cake! I wish I had the battery power for more pictures because this party was so gorgeous...but my new nickname seems to be "Ta-tas" which I really don't like...
...I also think Ashley liked her purse....

Making Bags

I didn't really do much today, but I have spent most of the day making my friend Melinda's sister a birthday present...I just found out I need to get up to leave at 6 instead of waking up at six....so today I am just going to post the pictures I have of the bag I made today (the "A" bag) and the one I made Kate a while ago and just finished up (the one that was confused for shorts)

Technically Thuresday

I know I have posted really late to the point where it is actually the next day, but some things came up. Nothing really important, but I was out with my mom till 10 and my dad was talking with me until 12 so....no escape.
The good news is a lot of cool things did happen today. I have a really cool new bowl (above) from the Christmas Tree Shop, 32 cents, really amazing prices there! I also got a lamp that my sister got Abigail (no picture available) and a frame for Abigail's portrait that I had done a while ago. I really love this bowl and I am so glad I was able to go to the store after not going for so long. Kristen's response "We po' so we can't go"....we may or may not have a problem with leaving this store empty handed...
Later, I picked up some of Aleene's Jewel-it Embellishing Glue™ and I will let you know how that stuff works after I use it to make Melinda's sister, Ashly (?), a purse and finish Kate's purse. There should be a lot of hard core gluing to do, so I hope it holds up. I wish I knew what brand, but my sister and I used some sparkling letters (iron on) from Wal*Mart that just didn't work. They were really nice looking, but not quite the quality one would expect (one letter was falling off at the end of the day!)
Any way, nothing else really happened today. I played DDR and emailed the woman who owes me money telling her, she owes me money!......more importantly, I REALLY need to start those purses!!!

10 Things we learn from movies:Greese

*Sorry that this is so late, technically I posted this on Friday, but I got caught up in some stuff with my parents and didn't get online till now*

Now for the 10 things we learn from Greese:

1. Greesy hair=being cool
2. Staying out past ten makes you a rebel
   
3. If you have a car you are automatically wicked cool(....Greese told me so mom Greese told me)
4. Pleather makes you HOT (Unless you are me!)
5. Having a penpal in the army gets you cool Korean stuff
6. You are not a whore till your pregnant
   
7. If you are called "Frenchy" it is not or your braids
8. A 30 year old woman can still pass for a high-schooler
   
9. Summer flings don't mean a thing (sorry all!)
10. Just because someone has pink hair DOES NOT mean it was intentional....but if you do decide to go to school and drop out, you get a cool ballad about it!
    

27 Dresses and Shimigami no Ballad

27 Dresses was a very cute movie about a woman named Jane and her apparent struggles with love. This movie was both very interesting, though at times, very predictable. I really enjoyed watching and it was a true chick flick (in fact we had to kick the boys out of the room a few times!). The only problem that stood out the most is one of the deleted scenes was in the first trailer...I don't know why but that really bothered me because it really made the movie so much better. It was a big love mess which was really emotional but fun to watch.

Shimigami no Ballad I have not seen much of the actual anime of but what I watched was the first two episodes of the live action version. Surprisingly, unlike Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, it did not have a huge Power Ranger affect (monsters and fight scenes). The live action show followed a good story line and looked surprisingly realistic for what it was. I enjoyed the two episodes I watched and I also found them very moving.
At the beginning Momo gets introduced as the "eccentric" shimigami because she has a white appearance and is "A class." later we find out she seems to be the only one with a true soul (you will know what I am talking about by seeing it)
I found this show by accident looking for the Death Note movie, which I have only seen half of and still haven't found, but both of these are superior in the live action and are well composed! Though if anyone hears of the Death Note movie in English, please let me know because it will make my life slightly easier!