Feelin the Burn

I am very content again today (yesterday) because I was finally able to see Carol. She is going through a hard time, but I feel like she is doing very well. She has grown a lot and is doing a lot better than she would have when I first met her. It was good hanging out with her and I had fun seeing someone besides my family...

What we did for most of her time over was knit and watch Sweeney Todd. We also broke out my wedding tiara (bought it on clearance YEARS ago) and I have officially re-fallen in love with it. I see others and sometimes forget why I picked it out in the first place. It is very unique and I think represents me well... Also on the topic of hair. Carol was brilliant and figured out the clipping mechanism in my extensions....long story short...I feel dumb!

Also, today I finally went on a long needed run/walk. Carol came and we went about a mile. I know it isn't much but it is more than I have done in a long time. I am actually impressed with how well I did. We did some warm ups ahead of time and I think it helped a lot. I am now feeling better about doing these exercises. I also followed up tonight and did some push ups and crunches. These will be a new nightly routine until I finally lose the weight I want.

Which leads to my last decision. No more trying to hide the fact that I am trying to lose weight so I wont be embarrassed if I don't succeed. I want to lose weight. I want to look better and feel better. I want clothes to fit and I don't want the occasional self consciousness that I get. Finally I don't want to weigh so much more than my boyfriend. I know he doesn't care and it should not matter, but it is one of the occasional self conscious things....plus I finally have a reason to actually fulfill my goal...I am pretty sure I will run with him this semester as well.......

Gaaaa Anti-fatness