Waiting To Know

I am still worry about these little things that I cannot control, but the biggest issue running through my mind seems to be whether or not I am going to see Joe before he get's deployed. This really seems like an issue I can bury inside me, but as I see it mentioned on the news and as I hear people trying to help, the issue comes up again. Really I don't know what to do, we are working to find a way to see each other and I should find hope in that, but at the same time I feel like I should plan against it. This is really my strongest method of dealing with things. By accepting the worst outcome, things going my way end up being a pleasant surprise.

I still feel like I am holding on strong. However, it needs to be realized that Joe hasn't officially left yet. Until the 8th comes along, or even the 11th, he is still somewhat around. I look at my lowest low and it still isn't that bad, I just hope I don't have Joe leave me in tears. A strange goal, but I don't want to have him feel worse about going. Plus, he is only gone for a year and he will be home soon....