January

There is nothing I hate more than my emotions on my period. There is just so much going on inside me, I really don't need it all amplified. At the same time, there is nothing more I can get accomplished than the things I get done during this week. It is almost as if this were the time for all my anxieties to flush out at once.

It is not that I have had a stressful week, just that my normal stresses are a bit heightened during this time. I am worried about school, my future, and Joe. Everything, I know, will work out, but I still worry. These past couple days I have been missing him a lot, and I have realized that there will be days next year that I will be just working through till the next day, and I am still okay with that. Sometimes, I look and I don't understand my decision. It goes against the norm, but I have never been one for the "norm" have I?

I await my potential trip to Arizona during intersession. Although I will be seeing Joe during the Christmas party, Arizona will be so much better. The only part I hate is that will be the last time I see Joe before he comes back on leave/gets home from deployment. Either that will be the day I truly become affected, or the last day I get to talk to him before he goes will be. Either way, some time in January I will find out how I am truly going to handle this.

I swear my next post wont be so emo....