School Soon

I really haven't posted in a while, which could be seen as either a good thing or a bad thing. My drive for the summer is almost completely gone and I no longer feel like running or even working on my book design for my internship. Now this is not saying I havn't worked on both things, just that it takes all of my self control to do what I need to do. Overall with running I have decided to only go once a week until school starts. This is really more to kick myself in the behind for not doing it more frequently, but also because I feel like I am not ready to really start again and this will push me to work harder during the school year.

When I do get back to school, I want to use the gym almost every day. I will also be weight training on alternate days so I will lose weight at a faster speed (from multiple sources). I am also going to buy an outfit that is size 12 for motivation for the school year. One could say that will be my official goal for the end of the semester. In the end I would like to be a 10, but we will see what I can do.

I am also on a version of weight watchers where I am using the self method. It is working out pretty good and I lost the weight I have gained from being home and fluctuating at my sisters house. Also this diet has really influenced my digestive system which makes me think my crappy stomach is due to a bad gall bladder in stead of lactose intolerance.

Things with me and Joe are also going swimmingly. We are both pretty antsy for him to be home in a few months and I am really looking forward to baking for a care package and getting his anniversary present. I am really happy with him lately and it is very comforting for him to be acknowledging that he misses me. For a while I thought that saying it would make it more real and harder, but now I realize how helpful it can actually be. Things I learned: I miss you isn't always a negative thing to say.

Aside from Joe I am still pretty lonely. I have been home for too long and not seen anyone outside of my family. It is pretty sad to say that the most social things I have done this summer have been wakes and my grandfather's funeral. I am just really glad that Joe ended up with his leave when he did because it passed all of the time till he came and then made me not think about the summer for another month. I am just happy that school is soon but I worry about the time Sam and I have deemed "Forever Summer."

In some ways there will never be a "Summer's almost over!" but at the same time I will be at work, which I have found is extremely close to school. Things are definably going to be different next year. I am not really concerned about getting a job because I have a skilled trade (and I know how to do just about everything in my field...mainly illustration is my biggest asset). What I am scared of is failing at all the things that should be coming easy. The good news is I know that everything will work out in the end.